"BIGENDER"
A starting point to understanding and learning about the bigender identity
"What does bigender mean?"
'Bigender' is a gender identity which can literally be translated as 'two genders' or 'double gender'. One who is bigender experiences exactly 2 gender identities, either at the same time or fluidly. These genders can be male and female, but also includes non-binary identities.
'Bigender' is an identity that falls under the non-binary, multigender, and transgender umbrellas.
"What pronouns do bigender people use? How do they present?"
Just like any other identity, bigender people can use whatever pronouns they wish to. Pronouns are a part of gender presentation, and presentation does not always equal identity.
The same can be said for clothing and outward presentation. Bigender people are free to express themselves however they wish to.
"What's the difference between this and genderfluid?"
Bigender refers to those with specifically two genders, while the label 'genderfluid' refers to one whose gender changes or varies over time, with no mention of the amount of genders which they vary between.
That being said, one can be both bigender and genderfluid, if one has two specific genders which they are fluid between.
"What sexuality can bigender people be?"
Any of them! Bigender people can be bisexual, gay men, lesbians, or anything else under the sun, just like any other non-binary label.
A common experience for bigender people who are m-spec is to feel aligned to two different types of attractions. For example, a male and female bigender who is bisexual may be both MLM and WLW at the same time! This is a decently common experience within those who have multiple genders, and these two identities do not contradict each other.
"Can bigender people be (gender) and (gender)?"
Yes! Bigender people can be any two genders! This can include binary genders, non-binary genders, xenogenders, or anything else at all!
"What is it like to be bigender?"
Click here to read some first-hand accounts from bigender people about their experiences, and how it feels to be bigender! (Warning: it's a little bit lengthy, but I believe it to be very valuable information!)
"Being bigender; explained by bigenders!"
The creator of this carrd ran a survey for bigender people to have them share their experiences and feelings about their identity. Here are some of the replies!
Bede (female and male): For me, a big part in figuring out I was bigender was my attraction. I’m a bisexual who always felt my attraction to men was MLM, and attraction to women was WLW. So when I discovered the label bigender, I knew that it was what I was. Well, more like I knew it’s what I wanted to be, but I found myself in a rut of ‘is it what I REALLY am, ACTUALLY?’ But the biggest sign that you are two genders, is that you want to be two genders.
Geno (female and male): I feel like a superfluous combination of male and female traits, and I happily express both at any given time. Sometimes I express one more than the other and at times they are equal, but what matters most to me is that I always feel like both male and female at all times. I feel pride in knowing I am both male and female and that I can express myself in a variety of ways to show others how I feel about myself.
Adam (male and agender): I forget I'm bigender sometimes, so at the times that I'm male I get a LOT of dysphoria and feel as if I was faking my nonbinary-ness. When I'm agender I feel completely disconnected from the idea of gender itself, which can throw me because yesterday I was 100000% sure I was a man, and now??????
When I first realized I was trans, I thought I was a binary trans man, which brought a lot of comfort at first but later caused a lot of internal conflict because I couldn't fully relate to any other binary trans men I met. I didn't know why, something was just...OFF. I realized that there were times I didn't feel at all connected to malehood/masculinity OR femalehood/femininity, and I felt a bit lost at sea tbh.
When I found the word bigender it was a big relief honestly, because it explained what I was going through with my fluctuating feelings around gender and showed I wasn't the only one with that experience. I also use the term "genderfaun" as a descriptor - either bigender or genderfaun work for me, and I'm working on being more comfortable with myself through these labels.
John (genderless and pangender): It's just kinda cool. It's nice to be able to be two things at once and not have to conform to cisnormativity.
Andy (male and female): My gender changes, but it is not fluid. It is a light switch. There is no "grey" area, it is extremely binary and harsh. I am very presentation & pronoun conforming, and I easily pass for both. Honestly, my gender is pretty simple. Even cishets understand it.
However, things do get complicated. I feel like an outsider often in queer spaces. I am not transgender or nonbinary, I am bigender. I do not use either of those labels. I am simply sometimes a man, sometimes a woman, in the least complex way possible. (Yes, I also use microlabels, but my bigender identity is the most important.) Like, no, I am not cis. No, I am not trans. Yes, I use a nonbinary gender label; no, I am not nonbinary. Do I belong in transgender spaces? God knows.
Bigenderness has also presented some unique circumstances I never hear being discussed. Being androgynous is extremely dysphoric to me, and I dislike they/them pronouns strongly; yet, I have to be neutral as a base if I want to consistently pass as both. I cannot go on hormones due to swinging "too far" on one side, even if I crave the effects often. (I believe I may be hormonally intersex, so my body is already pretty in the middle.) I experience struggles common both in transfeminine & transmasculine people, but I do not fit in either of those categories.
I am some sort of Schrödinger's queer.
Theron S (male and female): It makes me really happy, having a term that I can stand with positively, and not because it’s ‘close enough’. To me it’s more than a label, it’s part of my identity. I feel proud of who I am now.
I’ve always felt very in tune with my femininity, but defining myself as just a woman has always felt wrong. I’ve always felt that there was something more to me.
Ezra (demiboy and nonbinary): it feels... odd. i would say my gender is fluid between those two identities- i never feel fully like a boy, but i do feel somewhat like one some days, and other days i feel entirely divorced from the concept of genders as a whole, but i still have a very distinct gender, i just cant really percieve or comprehend it in relation to any other gender i can think of. most days, im a bit of both- i feel like my gender could be close to a boy, if i thouight about it, and i feel comfortable identifying myself using masculine terms, but i dont really feel like i have a proper gender in the way others view it, in the way i could label. i dont know if that makes sense.
Shulk (male and female): I am both female and male, The best way i can define it is kinda like an icecream where the two mix to make a new flavor entirely; but others can describe as it being two flavors at once. It feels kinda like two people fighting.
Madeline (neoboy and neogirl): It feels as though simply identifying as a single gender (be it female, male, or anything inbetween) can’t fully encompass how my gender feels. As though if I were simply a neoboy, I’d be missing that form of femininity that comes with being a neogirl, and vice versa. To take that away from me feels wrong, I can’t be just one. But when placed together, it feels right. I’m bigender, both masculine and feminine, and both are important to my identity. (Of course, being bigender isn’t just limited to masc and fem at once, but it’s how I personally feel.)
Alex (male and agender): Being bigender is super awesome, because it gives me a label for what is ultimately a very confusing identity to have. Sometimes it's like being gender fluid, in that my gender will switch from male to agender over the course of a day or week. Sometimes I feel just male for a while, and sometimes I feel just agender. But most of the time it is quite simply both at the same time. I'm a genderless man and a masculine agender at the same time. That's how I define my identity and that's how I like to be perceived. And being able to use the bigender label to explain that gives me a sense of euphoria.
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"What's the deal with the original bigender flag?"
The original bigender flag (pictured above) was created by tumblr user no-bucks-for-this-doe. The date of creation is unknown but it existed before July 30, 2014. The color meanings are that pinks represent femininity, blues represent masculinity, the purple represents nonbinary genders, and the whites represent agenders and other neutral genders.
However, this flag's creator was later outed as abusive, transphobic, and a pedophile. (The callout) (The post linking the person in the callout to the creator of the flag)
Because of this, the pictured flag is no longer considered appropriate to use, and alternative flags have been popularized.
"What are the popular alternatives?"
The two flags pictured above are flags which have been popularized as alternate bigender flags.
The one on the left's creator is unknown, and was created either before or on August 23, 2015. There are no known color meanings for this flag.
The one of the right's creator is tumblr user camp-mlm, and was created on August 8th, 2019, directly due to the original creator being outed as a bad person. The pink/blue stripes are for presentation and the feeling of your identities, the top white is for all kinds of good relationships, purple is for your unique bigender experience (how it feels and what it’s like), and for understanding each other in this community, and the bottom white is about self respect, pride, and being true to yourself.
These two are the most popular replacements, but they are far from the only bigender flags coined, especially after the original flag's creator was revealed to be bad.
"Are there any combination flags?"
Yes! There are multiple flags which represent bigenders with a certain sexuality or such. Here are a few of them:
Bigender lesbian (wuvsbian) / Bigender gay (effeminancyboy)
Bigender bisexual (nbgender) / Bigender aroace (whimsy-flags)
Bigender transfem (nbgender) / Bigender transmasc (nbgender)
"What is the history of the term 'bigender'?"
Provided here is a quick and easy run-down of bigender history!
1980s: One of the first recorded instances of bigender being used comes from a trans organization called the Human Outreach and Achievement Institute, which defined "bigenderist" as a type of androgyne, with the latter being defined as "a individual who can comfortably express either alternative gender role in a variety of socially acceptable environments."
1992: Donna Mobley wrote in 'The Femme Mirror' magazine: 'I'm neither a man pretending to be a woman nor a woman pretending to be a man. I'm dual-gendered and happily so. Don and Donna coexist and together they make up who and all that I truly am. To lose either part would leave me empty, since neither can exist without the other.'
1995: Gary Bowen, in his publication 'Dictionary of Words for Masculine Women', defined 'bigendered' as 'having two genders, exhibiting [sic] cultural characteristics of male and female roles.'.
1997: A paper concerning the 'gender continuum' in International Journal of Transgenderism noted that "a individual who feels or acts as both a woman and a man may identify as bi-gendered."
1999: A survey conducted by the San Francisco Department of Public Health observed that, among the trans community, less than 3% of those who were AMAB, and less than 8% of those who were AFAB, identified as bigender.
2010: In an encyclopedia, bigender is listed as a type of androgyne gender: 'Androgyne identities include pangender, bigender, ambigender, nongendered, agender, gender fluid, or intergender.'
2014: Bigender was one of the 56 genders made available on Facebook. This was also when the original bigender flag was created.
2015: An entry for 'bigender' was added to Dictionary.com, defined as 'a person who has two gender identities or some combination of both.' This is also when one of the two most popular alternate bigender flags was created, although the exact creator is unknown.
2017: 'Bigender' was one of the 37 gender options added to the dating network Tinder.
2019: Another one of the two most popular alternate bigender flags was created, and posted to the tumblr account camp-mlm.